Blazingshadows' characters

Name:  Mist the Wolf


Age: 16


Height:  3'2"


Eye color:  Yellow


Appearance: Mist is a half water elemental, giving her light blue fur and long straight hair made of water flowing down her back and ending at her knees.  She also has side swept bangs.Since she was a former princess, she wears a ruffled lime green t-shirt and a poofy turquoise skirt ending at her mid-thigh.  She completes the look with green sandal wedges, and a lime green headband.  She wears a heart mood necklace with a silver chain.  She has a fragile physique, and is very skinny.


Strengths:  She is very strong in her beliefs and won't stand down if something is very important to her. 


Weaknesses:  Mist is not very strong, so she doesn't fight well in hand-to-hand combat, or with any weapon.  And although water is her greatest power, she hasn't mastered it yet, so sometimes things go wrong, and someone else has to get their fur dried off.  She's also naive.


Personality:  She is overall a pretty nice person, but since she was originally a princess she is also spoiled and not used to having to live without a home.  If you make her angry, she will become rude and snobbish.  She can also be very stubborn.


Backstory: Mist was a princess, just happily living in her castle with her parents.  There was only one problem:  The water kingdom had not been on terms with the fire kingdom for a long time.  One day, the fire kingdom came and attacked.  Mist had to evacuate, as her father was killed in the fighting.  As she ran away from the battle, she met up with the fire elemental princess, and they ran off together.  Mist had been sort of burned, but the fire girl had no idea how to fix it.  During one of their first nights after running away, the flame princess forgot to wear her gloves, and accidentally lit the whole forest on fire.  Mist didn't escape unscathed.  Her whole body was covered in burns, and she didn't wake up for a long time. 
     Soon, the flame girl went into town to find a cure, and they were taken to a hotel where they could rest.  Mist eventually woke up.  As they lived together, they were ambushed by a mysterious hedge wolf, and some evil workers.  As they attacked, the two princesses tried to fight, but they were too weak.  Before both of them were killed, a cat grabbed them and ran away.  The three of them lived together until other things happened "don't want to spoil fanfiction".



Name: Ember the Fox


Age: 16


Height: 3'4"


Eye color: Emerald Green


Appearance: Ember is a full fire elemental, giving her fur made of fire and hair of flames (it looks like flame princesses hair, just look it up if you don't know what it is).  She has the ability to put her hair out, so that it turns normal.  When not on fire, her hair is naturally curly and goes down to her butt, but she usually has it in a ponytail going down to her mid-back.  Although she was the former fire princess, she doesn't have a glitzy style like Mist.  She wears a red t-shirt tied at her belly, with a yellow tank top under it.  For her bottoms, she wears black yoga pants.  Her shoes are yellow flats.  She wears thin fireproof yellow gloves to protect from burning everything.She has a stronger physique, but isn't as skinny as Mist.  


Strengths\Powers: She of course has the power of fire, and is pretty good at hand-to-hand combat.  She has a katana for a weapon, but she isn't amazing at it.


Weaknesses:  Although she is good at fighting, if she gets doused in water completely she will become useless and may die if she isn't relit soon enough.  


Personality Overall:  A sarcastic girl with a sense of humor, who is usually happy.


With strangers: She's helpful and respectful.


With friends: She's nice, with a hint of sarcasm and a sense of humor.


With enemies: She's hateful, but she respects their beliefs.


Backstory: Ember never wanted to be a princess, so she packed a suitcase and was ready to jump out the window when a servant came and said it was time to attack the water kingdom.  She was ushered out to her carriage with her parents and they left to attack.  During the battle, she jumped out of the carriage and ran away.  She met the water princess, who had a god-awful burn.  They lived together until attacked by that hedgewolf, and then they were saved by the cat.



Name: Smoke the Cat


Age: Unknown


Height: 3'4"


Eye color: Grey/Blue


Appearance: Smoke is a grey cat, who wears a black body suit so that you can only see her eyes, and black boots going up to her shin.  She also wears black gloves.  She basically looks like a ninja.


Strengths:  Smoke is an air elemental, though she isn't made of air.  She can ride the wind, but it's not completely flying because she can't do it for very long.  She only uses hand-to-hand combat, and strikes fast.


Weaknesses:  Since she strikes so fast, it doesn't do much damage.  Sometimes riding the wind backfires, and she plummets down to earth.  She's also a mute, which doesn't really help.


Personality overall: Quiet and expressionless; she doesn't show much emotion.


With strangers: Well we wouldn't know, would we?


With friends:  She's a mute, so no one really knows.


With enemies: She hates them, I think.....


Backstory: Smoke was a normal girl until she died and went to heaven.  The people in heaven (I won't preference anything, there are probably many different religions here) decided that she was strong enough to become an angel agent, and sent her back to earth to do good.  She saved two princesses and helped them live for a while, until she became a member of their team and abandoned her duties.


Name: Spirit the Hedgehog


Age: 517


Height: 3'6"


Eye color: Dark brown, almost black.


Appearance:  Spirit is a darkness elemental.  She has dark blue fur and black wavy hair going down to her mid-back.  She's also a ghost, so the ends of her limbs (hands, feet) are see-through.  She wears a navy blue t-shirt that's ripped at her belly, and jeans ripped at the knees.  Most of the time she wears a faded grey sweatshirt.  She wears black converse with it.  She has a broken heart necklace with a silver chain.  Her hair goes over one eye, which is actually not there (she only has one eye, but I won't go into detail because that would be kinda..... gruesome).


Strengths: Spirit is good at manipulating people with fear.  Although she is evil, she attracts many lovers.


Weaknesses:  She can be arrogant, and will believe that she has won before she even beat you, so she won't use all of her powers.  Also, if you threaten her little sister, she will do whatever you want.  Even though she's a ghost, bullets and stuff don't go through her.


Powers:  She has the power of darkness, and she can manipulate shadows.  Although she has these powers, she doesn't use them much and would rather use her knife or double pistols.




Personality:  Spirit is coldhearted and evil.  If you confess your love to her, she will go along with it and pretend to love you, but she's really using you.  She will eventually kill you and find someone else to torment.  If she actually makes friends, she will still be mean, but she won't hurt them.  She is secretly very protective of her friends, because she doesn't want to lose them.


Backstory:  Spirit was a nice girl from the 1600s era.  Her parents were rich, and she lived with them and her little sister, Hope.  One day, their house burned down, along with all of their money.  Her parents, desperate to live, sent their children to an orphanage.  Her and her sister lived together.  Soon, her sister had gotten a terrible disease, but with the medicine of the 1600s, they couldn't cure it (it turned out to be a form of cancer, but they didn't know that back then).  Spirit couldn't bear to see her like this.  In pure agony, she came upon a fortune teller and asked her to help her sister.  The fortune teller granted her sister immortality, with the cost of never growing into an adult.  Her sister was angry, shouting that she would rather die than never grow up.  That night, Hope left Spirit to find a life of her own.  Spirit was depressed, and left the town to find a new place without the terrible memories.  She committed crimes, and took up drinking and smoking habits.  Her nice girl personality soon turned to evil.  After a while, she couldn't take it anymore and killed a family.  The father of the family came home that night and saw the whole thing.  He went on a rampage, completely destroying Spirit (hence the one eye), and left her to die in a dark alley.  As she died, she thought about her sister.  As a dead person, she was sent back to earth, because even the underworld didn't want her.  She was recruited by Alcatraz the Hedgewolf, and she hunted people with him and his other followers.



Name: Rocky the Echidna


Age: 17


Height: 3'4"


Eye color: Hazel


Appearance: Rocky has green fur, and her echidna spikes are tied back into a ponytail.  She wears a purple t-shirt with a blue jacket, and blue sweatpants.  She wears grey sneakers with it.  She has a locket shaped like a moon with a gold chain.


Strengths:  Rocky is good at talking to people, and quite charming when it comes to making friends.


Weaknesses: Although she's talkative, she'd rather solve her problems with her fists.  She's also a slow runner, which doesn't help if she loses a fight.




Powers:  She's very strong and experienced in fist fighting.  




Personality:  She's a very laid back person.  She is usually the first one to make friends in a friendship.  She also has a good sense of humor.  If you insult her, she will become irritated around you.  If you all out bully her or taunt her, be prepared to get your lights punched out.


Backstory:  Rocky lived a normal life with her family in a rough city named Brightport.  There was one problem:  she wasn't a total girly girl like most girls in the city.  She would rather hang out with guys.  She would rather play video games than go shopping, so she didn't have many friends that were girls.  She was walking to the store once, when she decided to change things up.  She took a different road, a small path that lead to the store in a more roundabout way, but the scenery was amazing.  After walking for a few minutes, she encountered a street fight.  People (almost all men) were crowded around two fighters, betting money.  Rocky decided to watch.  As the fight ended, one man knocked out on the ground, the other seemed to be paid a salary.  It wasn't much, but it looked like enough to live by.  When she got home, she couldn't get the fight out of her head.
     The next day, she went to the gym.  She worked out for about 20 minutes before her muscles began to ache.  She tried to press on, but decided it was no use.  She kept going to the gym each day and increasing her time there.  20 minutes changed to 30, which changed to 40, which eventually got to about an hour.  She developed visible muscles, which scared the teasing girls away from her.  Soon, she dropped out of school.  Her parents were devastated, but they respected her decision and loved her all the same.  She returned to the pathway, finding yet another street fight.  She soon joined in and fought her first fight- and almost won.  She just had to keep at it.  She had to fight more.  She finally won a fight, but she wouldn't stop there.  Her goal was to become the best street fighter out there.  She is still accomplishing that goal today.



Name: Melody the Raccoon


Age: 12, but mature for her age


Height: 2'11"


Eye color: Brown


Appearance: Melody is a grey raccoon with black stripes on the side of her face.  She has short, black hair going down to her chin, which curls in at the ends.  She has a red t-shirt with black eighth-notes on it, and black jeans.  She wears red and black Nike tennis shoes.  She usually has her black guitar case with the guitar inside slung over her shoulder.


Strengths:  She has the power of music, which means she can use her voice/instruments to attack things, propel things forward, lift things, etc. (like she uses the sound waves).  She's good at charming people and making them like her.  She's also really good at living by herself (she gets most of the food from the bartenders for free, though.)
 

Weaknesses: She isn't exactly strong, and she is smaller and younger, so..... That kind of makes life harder.  She's very independent, and most likely won't accept your help (except for the food.  She needs that for living.)


Personality overall:  Calm, sweet, and helpful.


With strangers: She's calm, collective, and cool.


With friends: The same with strangers, but she listens to your problems and understands everyone.


With enemies: Not rude, but not nice either.  More sly, you could say.


Backstory: Melody was an only child with abusive parents.  After getting enough money from jobs, she bought her first instrument:  a flute.  She played her flute day and night, and it was basically her best friend.  One school year her teacher had hated her, and gave her a B in math.  Her parents were so furious, they smashed her flute to pieces.  When Melody figured out, she finally confronted her parents about their abusiveness.  They begged her not to call the police, and Melody almost did.  But she was a forgiving soul, and just ran away.  She ended up in a bar, on live music night.  After a band finished up, there were a few hours left until the club closed.  She got up on stage and sang "Hallelujah" by Jeff Buckley.  The people were mesmerized, and one man called her over.  He mentored her until she was amazing at music.  He was very old, and eventually died.  He gave her his best guitar in his will.  After grieving for days, she established a home for herself in the basement of her favorite club, and collected a number of instruments with the money she earned.




Name: Topaz the Siamese Cat


Age: 17


Height: 3'6"


Eye color: Yellow


Appearance: Topaz's fur is white with brown points, like the tip of her tail, her muzzle, and the tops of her ears, and her paws.  She has dark brown hair with gold highlights in a high ponytail.  She has a black headband with gold beads hanging off of it.  Her dress is a long, faded white gown with a slit on each side, both stopping just before her crotch so you can see her legs, but a long section of dress embroidered with gold goes down to just before her feet and ends pointed like an arrow, so it covers her crotch in the middle. The neck piece of the dress is golden with black lines on it.  It is sleeveless, and the belt has the same design as the neck piece.  She wears black high heels with gold heels that look like snakes.


Strengths:  She can communicate with all animals.


Weaknesses:  She isn't strong, and she fights like a girl.


Personality overall:  Spoiled and bossy.  Becomes the leader in most situations.


With strangers:  She can be bossy and demanding, but usually just seems neutral.


With friends:  Not much of a sense of humor, gets things done.


With enemies:  Cold hearted and mean, but not as bad as Spirit.


Backstory:  Topaz was the daughter of the Pharaoh, a very orderly and cold hearted man.  She was a daddy's girl, and he gave her everything...... until Egypt got into a war with Greece.  Egypt lost the war, and he gave them his daughter instead of his money.  She went to a prison in Greece, until a man broke her out and took her to Mobius, where she ended up living in Station Square.  She refused to give up her old clothes, so she could always remember her culture and heritage.



Name: Luna the Wolf


Age:  18


Height:  3'5"

Eye Color:  Bright Purple


Appearance:  Luna is a wolf with shimmering, silver fur and bright neon straight purple hair.  Her body has a perfect hourglass figure.  She wears a white shirt, and a purple skirt going down to just above her knees.  She also wears clear glass pumps.  She also has a french accent, but it seems slightly off..


Strengths:  She is not shy at all and is not afraid to ask questions.  She is also a hacker,  which means she can get into records and find certain things that she should not see (she hasn't been caught..... yet....).


Weaknesses:  If she gets worked up, then it could cause a system overload and she will faint (i.e too angry, sad, in love, happy, etc.). She is also very trusting and naïve.  If she gets splashed with or pushed into water, she will short circuit and pass out.  There is a microscopic button on her neck that if nudged or pushed, will shut her down.  Only a scientist would be able to bring her back. 


Powers:  Under her fingernails, she has retractable razors.  To activate this, she actually thinks the commands for the computer instead of typing.  The fact that she has a computer loaded onto her hard drive explains that.  Shecan basically go online in her vision (she and only she can see the internet whenever she wants) and search anything she might have to in the moment.


Personality:  Luna is sweet and nice and always there to help.  Even if you are a total stranger, and you need some help with your grocery bags, she will come to you and help you carry them.  She doesn't just talk to everyone constantly, though.  Only if you need help, or she needs to ask a question.  She is also calm most of the time, as to prevent a system overload.  But if you happen to make her angry (which I don't know why you would), she will turn into some kind of monster.  She will most likely rip you apart even at the smallest insult (being calm all of the time is hard work).


Backstory:  Back when she was 14, she was a normal girl with normal grey fur and normal brown hair.  She had normal green eyes.  Alas, she was not a normal girl.  She was crazy, and said many things that did not make sense.  She was referred to as "Looney" by some of her friends. The truth was, she did not belong on Mobius.  She was a refugee from a planet called Auvenia.  After 12 years of living on Mobius with her parents, she had gotten bored.  She took an interest in those mystical ruins.  She did so much research, and saved up her allowance until she had enough money to afford a trip to them.  With her parents blessing, she set off to find them.  When she finally came across them, she was so overjoyed she started exploring immediately.  She had planned to stay for a couple of months, but she lost track of time and kept researching.  In one temple, she found the skeletal remains of a Mobian.  She was surprised, as she had not seen this before.  As she wrote in her journal while she walked, she took no regard of the incoming chasm....



    Days later, her battered body was found by a scientist.  After staring for a moment and thinking about what could have happened to this poor girl, she took the body to her camp, and thought for a moment.  What could she do?  She studied the anatomy of Mobians on her laptop (she designed the wifi station herself) for days, then began to draw a sketch of the girl's new body on the temple walls.  It took weeks of perfection.  Once her sketch was done, she began work on the body.  She transformed Luna's bloody and ripped body into one of the most beautiful bodies on Mobius.  When it was done, she took samples of her DNA and used them to make a personality chip.  She also made a memory chip, but she could not recover everything Luna had known before her death.  In fact, she couldn't get anything.  As the scientist applied the other things that were needed for Luna to function properly, she thought for a moment.  She added retractable razors under her fingernails, just in case she ever got in trouble.  Although her new design was beautiful, without the nails she would be practically defenseless.  It was built for attractiveness, not fighting.  Once everything had been done, she was dressed and a microscopic button on her neck was pushed.  Her bright purple eyes opened, and after a few seconds she looked around and then settled on the scientist.  Her french accent rang out in the temple.  "Hello.  My name's Luna.  Do you mind telling me where I am?"



Name: Lana


Age:  Unknown


Height:  None


Eye Color:  None


Appearance:  She doesn't have an exact mobian look and is rarely seen, but when she is she can be described as a faint, faded pink light.


Strengths:  She is very persuasive, and has very good advice.  She also can't be killed (This is not godmodding, it's explained in her backstory).  She can speak every language imaginable.


Weaknesses:  She can't move or walk around, because she has no body. 


Powers:  If she has to, she can multiply her voice so she can help out multiple people at once.


Personality:  She is calm, quiet, and always knows the right thing to do.  If you don't know what to do, she will tell you what to say.


Backstory:  Lana was born sickly and underweight.  As a baby, she eventually died, leaving her parents grieving and horribly sad.  When she went up to heaven, it was truly a sad sight to see.  The tiny girl was held by an angel, as she was too young to walk.  She grew up there, and she was soon a happy child, raised by the wisest angels and mothers who died before their children.  She only had one wish, and it was to be able to walk on Mobius, to live and play.  She knew it would never be possible now, but she always had hope that maybe she could be reincarnated.  Instead, after proving that she was wise enough, the angels sent her down to Mobius.  Not as a ghost, or a guardian angel, but as a person who lived inside peoples' brains;  their concience.  Have you ever had a voice in the back of your head telling you to do what was right?  That was Lana, just doing her job.  Although she loved to help people out, she longed to have a body to call her own.  She eventually gave up having her own head and decided to just do what she was doing; helping others keep theirs.




Name:  Mirror the Cat


Age:  17


Height:  3'3"


Eye Color:  Amber/yellowish


Appearance:  Mirror is a black cat with wavy neon green hair going down to her belly.   She wears a tight, neon green leather dress that goes down to her mid-thigh with silver leggings under it.  With the dress, she wears a small silver jacket, with black lines on it that make it look like a cracked mirror.  To finish the look, she has green flats.


Strengths:  She's pretty smart, and she has a lot of friends to back her up.


Weaknesses:  She is bipolar, which means she can go into moods of mania (overly happy or extremely irritable), depression (overly sad or feeling hopeless), hypomania (mild version of mania; feeling good and productive.  This leads to severe mania or depression), and mixed (mania and depression) from 7 days (mania) to 2 weeks (depression).  This is not paired well with the fact that she is also very unlucky.


Powers:  She has no powers, she is just a normal Mobian (minus being bipolar).


Personality:  Mirror is happy, bubbly, and very excited most of the time.  All of this aside, she is a pessimist and always looks at the worst case scenario.  Her mood can change with the snap of a finger.  When she's angry, she is ANGRY.  She will scream, shout, and try her best to kill whatever just set her off (she's not very strong, and most attempts are futile).


Backstory:  Mirror was a normal little girl who always seemed a little off.  One day, when she was 12, they had her checked out and figured out that she was bipolar.  Although her parents still loved her, she didn't love herself.  She knew she was a burden, and throughout her teen life she had gone through many tough times, but she could never bring herself to end it.  Soon, she met her friend Topaz, who protected her from all bullies.  Since she was bipolar but no one else at school knew but Topaz, she was made fun of a lot.  Topaz protected her, and made sure she always took her meds.  The two could never be torn apart.

*updated.  New characters added.

Not a criticism, but may I suggest making the different characters different colours? The white's a little hard on the eyes cause there's so much and hard to tell when there's a new character at first glance :c

Fixed it!  Also bolded some stuff and pulled the bios apart so they're a little easier to read.  And Tank, if you're still reviewing people's bios, it would be nice if you reviewed Luna's for me.  You don't have to, though.

That looks a lot better on the eyes! And sure, I'd be glad to. Lady-Tragedy's also doing reviews if you want a second opinion!

Thank you!  And after yours, I might get one from Lady.  I don't have any pictures, though....

Don't worry about pictures, a description is good enough! We're not all artists, and none of us expect everyone to be! Just as long as you can describe your character, you're good to go!

---

Now I'm gonna skip name, age, and appearance for obvious reasons. Though I do think that you should include eye colour in the appearance, since unless there's a special reason I don't think it needs to be separated.

Strengths:  Her fingernails can turn into razors at any given moment.  She's also pretty good at talking to people, and not too shy to walk up to total strangers.  She can get information on people if she wants, by searching their public records online.

Off to a good start! Just gonna say I like that her strengths aren't entirely combat based. It makes her seem more fleshed out and less like a mindless soldier looking for battle. Honestly I'd say put the first part about her abilities into a 'powers' section too, just so you can expand on that and tell us what she's able to so with them other than scratch enemies and slice up salami for a good meal. Ah, and the last point, how does she access that? I know it's 'public records' but any information you could ever want on a person shouldn't really be public. It's like if I wanted to learn more about you, I then go online and find your address and your grades and such. That information is dangerous and usually restricted to the government or officials only.

Weaknesses:  If she gets worked up, then it could cause a system overload and she will faint.  She is also very trusting, but sometimes too trusting.

You might want to define 'worked up'. You mean, angry or sad or any overload of a certain emotion? So she'd need to remain calm and collected at all times? ...I'm not gonna delete what I just said cause I just looked to what the next few words are in the bio and now I feel like an utter moron. Shhhh you saw nothing I am just a tired silly today.
You might want to expand on your points a tad, overall I'd say. Give them a good few sentences explaining them, giving examples. Maybe bullet point them and explain them underneath to make them look pretty.
Oh! And if she's a robot (or, well, sort of rebuilt, you know what I mean either way), can she be around water? Like, if she was to be submerged, like pushed into a pool, would it have no effect? I'm just curious, you don't really need to expand on that. Plus, you said they had a switch at the back of their neck in a bio. Even if microscopic, what if something hard is pushed against her neck? Or can the button only be pushed once?

Personality overall:  Calm, collective, and nice.  

Ignore what I said earlier shh, I saw this you can't prove anything.
I'm fine with three words as long as that doesn't entirely sum up the personality and you add something which expands on it. Though I'm gonna make a point, don't separate personality into 'with friend' or 'with enemies' or all that. Redo it completely. Because the bio on the forum needs to be redone anyway, trust me, it's awful and don't go by it.
Just make a paragraph, going in depth, rather than splitting it. It looks a lot better, trust me.

With strangers:  She is very open to strangers, and will ask questions without being shy. She is nice and helpful towards them.

With friends:  Basically the same as she is with strangers, but nicer.

With enemies:  She will ignore you until you provoke her, and then she will kill you.  She can get reaaly angry.

I'm gonna go a little in depth with this, though I really think you should bundle this up and change it all since splitting personality like this is silly (That's obviously not your fault though!)
With strangers: Does she try to talk to everyone she meets? I understand she's open, and very social and welcoming to other people, but does she literally try to start a conversation with each stranger on the street, or just when it's the whim-of-the-moment like, say, characters sat at a park? From this I understand that she's always the one to talk first, and always tries to keep a conversation going. See, this shows that she's a curious individual. She isn't afraid of leaning about others and getting close. It also shows she cares more about others than herself, and thus is very self-sacrificing. See?  A lot of things you've maybe missed out, it's your character though so I'm just guessing.

With friends: 'But nicer' needs to be expanded upon. Or it would, but really just bundle this up altogether. Like, really, stops having subsections and just makes it one good read.

Right, let me give you an example rather than go onto 'with enemies' because this is giving me a headache:
"Luna is, overall, a wonderful person to meet. She is known for always starting a conversation with strangers, believing everyone has a story and that everyone should be happy, which admittedly makes her a little curious for her own good. So curious, in fact, that if you don't tell her she'll probably search you up and find out herself. She tries to keep a positive and calming atmosphere around her despite this obsession, making little sacrifices like her free time to ensure the world is a better place, and thus is very easy to make friends with, since she'll trust you in a heartbeat.

However, she is not one to be agitated. Why you'd push her buttons I'll never know, but if you try and start a fight with her or make her unhappy, or even hurt another person who she's been trying so hard for, she'll lash out in an irrational fit of anger, flipping a switch to become a terrifying monster which would draw blood without a moment's hesitation. The calming voice of another is usually enough to soothe this terrifying rage, however."

See? Obviously, she's your character and I've obviously got some things wrong, but expanding points is your friend - don't be afraid to babble. Personality expands on a lot of points which can be touched upon.

Backstory:

Gonna be honest and say this is the thing I always dread reviewing. So many word-


Actually I'm probably gonna make backstory a separate post because I kinda have to get going now because I'm a silly so can't keep track of time. Whoops. Sorry! Hope I gave you enough info there to help, and the rest of it will be complete later today!

Wow!  This is really good advice!  Thank you for this, I'm going to add some of this stuff right away.

Updated again.  New character.

Updated again.  10 characters!  Woop!

Back when she was 14, she was a normal girl with normal grey fur and normal brown hair.  She had normal green eyes.  Alas, she was not a normal girl.  She was crazy, and said many things that did not make sense.  She was referred to as "Looney" by some of her friends. The truth was, she did not belong on Mobius.  She was a refugee from a planet called Auvenia.

Right! Back to the bio!
So from this I can tell that she lived on a different planet called Auvenia. This is kind of a massive thing. And it's just thrown there, but for the sake of what? How has it affected and changed the character? How did they even get to Mobius? Do they have a different appearance or do occupants look exactly like mobians? Like, I don't see how this relates to the character all that well. You could say she was born on Mobius and it wouldn't affect a thing. Does she have an alternate form thing going on? Was there an event there which made her the way she was as a child? Actually, what was even going on in the planet - why did they have to be 'refugees' and why did they leave? Does she even remember she's from there or did her parents keep it a secret? There needs to be a reason for things! Key thing!

After 12 years of living on Mobius with her parents, she had gotten bored.

Right, so how would she remember the planet since she left at the age of 2? Wouldn't mobian traditions influence her more and thus rendering the whole assumed 'crazy' for naught? Even if her parents told her where she originated, the mobians around her and their behaviors would affect her more.

She took an interest in those mystical ruins.  She did so much research, and saved up her allowance until she had enough money to afford a trip to them.  With her parents blessing, she set off to find them. 

You mean Mystic Ruins? I'm gonna go with that. Though how old was she when she left? Since isn't it rather very dangerous to send a child out to the Mystic Ruins alone without any guidance? What if she got lost? Or hurt? I mean, there's some really terrifying individuals on Mobius. Think of how many 'murderer' characters there are, or overall 'trying to be evil and hurty'. Surely her parents would be a little concerned about that? Like, they could even go themselves for a nice trip out! A birthday present!

She had planned to stay for a couple of months, but she lost track of time and kept researching.

A couple of months.
Do her parents not care?
Like, are they not worried of scientists experimenting on her due to her being an alien? Or just dying in general? Murdered? Again, getting lost? How could she fund several months? Like, it'd be more logical for her parents to go rather than fund their young daughter to go explore the unknown! Especially since, up to this point, she has no way of defending herself!

As she wrote in her journal while she walked, she took no regard of the incoming chasm....

Worst parents. Ever.

After staring for a moment and thinking about what could have happened to this poor girl,

He was exploring a chasm and wondered what happened to her? Really? Did he not take the front entrance and notice it or was there another exit? Not a criticism really, but I find it funny. "There's a giant chasm here and the entrance is up there. It looks recent and her body is at the bottom. What in the world caused her to be this way?"

What could she do?  She studied the anatomy of Mobians on her laptop (she designed the wifi station herself) for days, then began to draw a sketch of the girl's new body on the temple walls.  It took weeks of perfection. 

Rather than just say 'a scientist' you could make it her mother. Maybe her mother was a scientist and worked on extraterrestrial scientific technology, and was exploring the ruins to both find her daughter (who she abandoned, what a bitch), found her daughter, and since she was close to death, fixed her up with her knowledge? It's better than just making it 'a random scientist' who had no real motivation or drive to fix up this random mobian.
But I will firmly state that this is your character. I'm just offering suggestions which would make more sense, but it's also a possibility to make the scientist make sense. Just always stay logical! Make sure everything is reasonable! You don't have to follow my suggestions if you don't like!

She transformed Luna's bloody and ripped body into one of the most beautiful bodies on Mobius.  When it was done, she took samples of her DNA and used them to make a personality chip.  She also made a memory chip, but she could not recover everything Luna had known before her death. 

Why the most beautiful?
And more important, remember that 'beauty' is entirely opinionated, like art. Her beauty may not be that beautiful to others, since everyone's opinion on what is most beautiful is always gonna be different. But I get the idea - she looks really really pretty.
ANOTHER QUESTION
How does DNA affect personality? Answer: It doesn't. Personality doesn't relate to that at all. You could have it be extracted from her brain instead, both a personality and memory trip since the two do entwine.

 In fact, she couldn't get anything.  As the scientist applied the other things that were needed for Luna to function properly, she thought for a moment.  She added retractable razors under her fingernails, just in case she ever got in trouble.  Although her new design was beautiful, without the nails she would be practically defenseless.  It was built for attractiveness, not fighting.  

That's rather specific, but I won't really dwell on that. I'm more concerned with how they managed to do this at the bottom of an abyss without starving, dehydrating, and just getting the materials required to perform these procedures.

Once everything had been done, she was dressed and a microscopic button on her neck was pushed.  Her bright purple eyes opened, and after a few seconds she looked around and then settled on the scientist.  Her french accent rang out in the temple.  "Hello.  My name's Luna.  Do you mind telling me where I am?"

Why French? That's the only thing I really want to know. Like, specifically French. Why? Like, you didn't give a reason. Just that it's French. Was there a glitch in the system? Did she just have a french accent when born? Despite being from another planet?
That still bothers me. The whole 'from a different planet' doesn't affect the character whatsoever. And what about her parents? Do they just assume she's dead? Are they not concerned? Did they search the area? Warn the officials? Again, really shitty parents. Like, you'd think you'd go on a search or something all things considered.

In the end, just keep one thing in mind - make sense. Everything should have a reason. It needs to be justified. Think it from different character's perspectives and wonder how they would deal with it.

Alright, you are pretty right in that it has to make sense.  Some of the reasons, though, are because I'm incredibly lazy and still have to write something about Auvenia in factions and stuff:

1.  Luna isn't crazy because she's from Auvenia, and of course she doesn't remember.  She just happened to be born that way.

2.  Auvenians are exactly like Mobians, except for one thing:  each Auvenian has a unique power:  whether it be typing at the speed of sound or fixing your bed sheets exactly perfect each time.  They are also a far more harsher planet than Mobius, and most parents were too busy to monitor their children, and her parents never left the house and worked from home, so they still operated under Auvenian customs.  Also, to make this make more sense:  I will add that she lied to her parents, making them think she was going with her friends.

3.  Yes, they did go on a search.  But by the time they did her body was already gone.  Also I'm going to edit how long she was there.

4.  The scientist is not her mother, because she is actually one of my characters that I'm going to write a bio on.  She ends up being Luna's best friend.

5.  As I have not written about Auvenia yet, I will state that Mobians and Auvenians are not on good terms with each other.  Auvenians are not permitted on Mobius, thus most never come out of their homes.  There is no way to tell Auvenians and Mobians apart without testing DNA and stuff like that.

6.  I wanted to make a french character, and I thought I could add that to her personality.  Also, french accents are supposed to be attractive, and that's why the scientist (Melissa) programmed it that way.

7.  Melissa has another team of scientists who research stuff.  They carry food, water, and as much scientific equipment as possible.  I'm adding that in here.

Hope this answers your questions.  I'll edit it tomorrow, not really in the mood now.

Updated some of the appearances and personalities.  Nothing super important.

Eye color: Hazel


Appearance: Rocky has green fur, and her echidna spikes are tied back into a ponytail.  She wears a purple t-shirt with a blue jacket, and blue sweatpants.  She wears grey sneakers with it.  She has a locket shaped like a moon with a gold chain.

Her appearance, I'm actually quiet happy with it actually!  You seemed to put together a lot of cool colors with her color scheme that I'm fine with myself.  The only thing that I suggest as a minor thing is to change the color of the sneakers.  The grey as I'm picturing it, throw off the rest of the color scheme.  I would just change it to maybe a shade of blue of purple so it goes well overall.  The eyes is a minor suggest of changing the color of them but I think the hazel eye should work since hazel is a mix of brown and green anyways.  You did pretty good on the appearance!

Strengths:  Rocky is good at talking to people, and quite charming when it comes to making friends.


Weaknesses: Although she's talkative, she'd rather solve her problems with her fists.  She's also a slow runner, which doesn't help if she loses a fight.

A lot of your strengths and Weaknesses aren't really strengths or weaknesses.  A lot of the information about her being good at talking and such are more suited in the personality section. Strengths maybe you can put in more about her fighting style maybe or something along those lines?  Weaknesses can aslo have a bit more added to it I feel.

Powers:  She's very strong and experienced in fist fighting.  

This bothers me slightly because it just too vague for me.  Why is she strong?   What makes her experienced?  How experienced is she?  There need to be a lot more added to this section.

Personality:  She's a very laid back person.  She is usually the first one to make friends in a friendship.  She also has a good sense of humor.  If you insult her, she will become irritated around you.  If you all out bully her or taunt her, be prepared to get your lights punched out.

Her personality, seem good to me actually.  Really can't find an issue with it at all and that material I mention sticking here won't affect anything here.  Really nothing bad I can say about the personality, you did a good job here too!

Backstory:  Rocky lived a normal life with her family in a rough city named Brightport.  There was one problem:  she wasn't a total girly girl like most girls in the city.  She would rather hang out with guys.  She would rather play video games than go shopping, so she didn't have many friends that were girls.  She was walking to the store once, when she decided to change things up.  She took a different road, a small path that lead to the store in a more roundabout way, but the scenery was amazing.  After walking for a few minutes, she encountered a street fight.  People (almost all men) were crowded around two fighters, betting money.  Rocky decided to watch.  As the fight ended, one man knocked out on the ground, the other seemed to be paid a salary.  It wasn't much, but it looked like enough to live by.  When she got home, she couldn't get the fight out of her head.
     The next day, she went to the gym.  She worked out for about 20 minutes before her muscles began to ache.  She tried to press on, but decided it was no use.  She kept going to the gym each day and increasing her time there.  20 minutes changed to 30, which changed to 40, which eventually got to about an hour.  She developed visible muscles, which scared the teasing girls away from her.  Soon, she dropped out of school.  Her parents were devastated, but they respected her decision and loved her all the same.  She returned to the pathway, finding yet another street fight.  She soon joined in and fought her first fight- and almost won.  She just had to keep at it.  She had to fight more.  She finally won a fight, but she wouldn't stop there.  Her goal was to become the best street fighter out there.  She is still accomplishing that goal today.

The backstory...I'm kinda torn on it here.

I feel like a lot of this is following a cliche of the "tomboy trying to prove how tough she is" that's going on here which feels like your putting too much emphasis on that aspect on her.  I think that you need to work on that and many tone it done so it isn't as obvious as I'm seeing it.

That said a few things seem off from what I'm reading.  Street fighting, I'm pretty sure its an illegal activity, it wouldn't be something that you can get into easily without going "underground" so to say.  Her being a drop I can believe... if she was a trouble kid that say was running off to be part of said street fights.  I also can't see her parents being exactly okay with that either.

I also found the "working out" sections of her backstory a bit unnecessary?  That detail really doesn't need to be there, you can just simple say that she slowly worked her way up to being stronger.  Other than that, backstory can use a decent amount of work.

Overall your getting there with Rocky!  You pretty much got her personality and appearance nearly down but need to definitely work on the backstory and the other details as I mentioned.  Once those are fixed, I can say that you'll have a good character on your hands!